


Flaming Punch

by museofspeed



Category: DCU, DCU - Comicverse
Genre: Drunkenness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-01
Updated: 2010-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-05 13:52:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/museofspeed/pseuds/museofspeed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a party at JLI headquarters. Wacky hijinks ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flaming Punch

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Abarero](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Abarero).



> Took me forever to post this, agh. Thanks to julius12 for beta'ing! Originally posted here for boostlethon. Also, bad jokes. I should warn for that, right?

"What ho, Teddy-lad, pip pip." Booster said. He brandished a walking stick and adjusted a fake monocle.

Ted smirked and bowed. "Mr. Gold, dahling, simply smashing to see you."

"Would you like some biscuits, dear boy?" Booster asked, holding out an arm.

"Shut it, both of you," Bea said, walking out. She was wearing an ankle-length green dress. "How are you not dressed yet? The reception's in just a few hours!"

"Bea, you look _fantastic_ in that dress!" Ted said. "Green is really your color."

"Of course it is," Booster said. "She always wears green."

"Well, yes, that's the point, Booster buddy." Ted offered her his arm. "You'll be my date to the event, right? Us formal dignitaries are expected to have dates."

"Have Booster be your date," Bea said, pushing by him. "I'm not leaving Tora to be alone with _Gardner._"

Ted sighed dramatically. "I thought of asking Tora, but I'm afraid she'd just give me the cold shoulder."

Everyone in the room just sighed. Bea rolled her eyes. "I'm going to find her. Be there on time, or don't be there at all. Really, I'd prefer the latter." She trounced out of the room.

"You want me to be your date?" Booster asked.

"Don't be ridiculous. We need to find some girls," Ted said. "We're both men."

"Well, in the _future…_"

"Finish that sentence and I'll find you a time machine so you can go _back_ to the future." Ted started walking. They were both in civvies. No reason not to go out and find some nice girls to take as dates.

"I hated that movie." Booster followed him.

"You, sir, have no taste."

"It's just, that's not how time travel works!"

"Of course not. If they had real time travel, everyone would want to do it." Ted stopped at the stairs. "Bea! We're going to find dates! Don't worry, we'll be there!"

"It'll go smoother if you don't show up!" She yelled back down the stairs.

"You know, maybe I shouldn't have tried asking her either," Ted mused as they left the embassy. "Playing with Fire is just asking to get burned."

Booster groaned. "Beetle, your jokes just keep getting worse. Where are we going?"

"Bar. Two good-looking fellows like us should be able to pick up some nice girls in no time."

"Think you're right—assuming you don't try and say anything to them!"

"Hey, if they wanted a quiet guy, I'd set them up with Batman." Ted frowned. "No, I can't think of any woman who deserves someone that terrifying. Maybe Amanda Waller. Can you imagine it? 'Amanda Waller and Batman Tie the Knot! Guests Quake in Fear!'"

"Beetle buddy, I'm trying hard _not_ to imagine it." Booster shuddered dramatically. "I think I'm gonna have to drink to forget that image."

"Me too, me too." Ted led him into the bar and grinned at a pretty woman sitting near the entrance. "Hey there. How'd you like to—"

"Get lost," the woman said, blowing cigarette smoke into his face. Ted coughed and stepped back.

"Struck down and only just crossed the threshold!" Booster whooped. "Ted 0, ladies of the world 1!"

"Yeah, well, let's see you do better, _Michael._" Ted scowled and stalked over to the bar to order a drink.

A few minutes later Booster joined him. "I still lasted longer than you."

"Face it, Booster. We're nice guys. Means we'll always finish last."

"Maybe we _should_ just go together."

"It'd make a bold statement anyway."

"You know, in the _future…_"

"If the end of that sentence isn't 'men like us are considered the hottest thing around and always get dates,' I don't want to hear it."

"No, I was just gonna say that people go to events without dates."

"Oh." Beetle looked at his drink for a moment, then took another sip. "Well, we _could_ do that."

"See? Problem solved!" Booster grinned. "And maybe we'll meet someone and—"

"Oooor," Ted cut him off. "We could get drunk and then go to the reception!"

"Oooh, that'll drive Bea crazy!" Booster stole Ted's drink and chugged the rest. "Bartender! Get me and my buddy more of the same!"

"Let's see some ID," the Bartender said.

"Don't let him drink!" Ted said, chuckling. "He's negative five hundred-something! Nowhere near old enough!"

"You're just jealous I look young enough that they have to card me." Booster pulled out his wallet and flashed his ID. The bartender nodded and brought them more drinks.

"Good thing you didn't leave it in your other tights, huh?" Ted asked.

"I'm not wearing my tights." Booster said.

"Look guys," The bartender said, "I hear there's a gay bar down the—"

"Why do people keep suggesting we're gay?" Ted complained.

"There was that time in the—"

"Remember how we were never going to discuss that?" Ted asked loudly.

"Consider it not discussed!" Booster saluted. "What now?"

Ted threw an arm over his shoulders. "Now, we hope we have more luck with the ladies when we're drunk."

Booster took a swig of his drink. "I'm not sure this is the most brilliant plan we've ever had."

"It's not the worst plan, either."

"That's because nothing could be worse than Kooey Kooey Kooey."

Ted nodded and grinned. "_Exactly._"

Booster grinned and shook his head, then glanced at Ted's arm, which was still around his shoulders. "You know, I think I might see how people might possibly have the faintest, _slightest_ suspicions that we're gay."

Ted snorted. "We're best friends! Nothing gay about it!" And in defiance of all the people who could think that two friends who just happened to spend all their time together and be very touchy-feely had to be gay, he decided to leave his arm there.

"Course not." Booster shook his head. "Getting drunk?"

"Good plan." Ted scoped the bar. "See any hot girls? Or, you know, girls who look like they're in our league?"

"What, you think Bea followed us?"

"Not the _Justice_ League, you cretin. Our league like—oh, never mind."

Booster shrugged. "Whatever you say." He leaned back and took another sip of beer.

 

Tora was having a good time. Guy was on one side of her and Bea was on the other. Sure, Bea had sent a few… pointed remarks at Guy, and Guy had called Bea something that rhymed with "sockrock," but overall, it was a fairly nice evening. And Guy really did look dashing in a tux.

"Y'know who's not here?" Guy said. "Those cretins. Blue and Gold."

"So?" Bea rolled her eyes. "Who needs them?"

"Bea, be nice," Tora frowned a little. "I do hope they're okay."

"I'm with Fire here, actually," Guy said. "They'd just screw somethin' up."

Bea made a face and shuddered. "I'm changing my mind already. I hope they're okay."

Tora just shook her head. Then she noticed movement by the doorway. "Oh! Look, there they are now!"

"Speak of the devil," Bea said.

"Are they _drunk?_" Guy asked. "Those bastards! Went to a bar without me leaving me at this lousy-ass event?"

"Guy!" Bea scowled at him. "This event means a lot to Tora and I won't have you ruining it!"

Tora shook her head and left them arguing. She'd rather go make sure Booster and Beetle were okay. And possibly get them safely out of the way before they made a scene.

She couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but despite being clearly drunk out of their minds, they seemed strangely serious. Booster was talking earnestly to Ted, who looked… Tora wasn't sure how to describe it. Apprehensive bordering on interested?

And then they started kissing. Tora's mouth fell open a little in surprise, then she smiled and looked around. Kissing in the middle of the American Embassy was likely to cause a scene. But no, Guy had dumped the punch on Bea, who had burst into flame, and everyone was looking at them instead. Too bad, that dress had been really nice.

Ted pulled Booster out and up the stairs. They'd be fine. Tora walked back to Guy and Bea. With those two out of the way, she still had two other people to worry about.


End file.
